I love a good tv show. I really do. But I haven’t turned on my tv in a long time.
Sometime in 2016 I thought I might practice living a life a little less mediated — less at the mercy of someone else’s idea of what stories I should carry with me, what images, what narrative.
Not so I could replace them with my own stories, images, narrative. But so I could replace them with nothing.
Nothing but space.
Life being life, I knew other things would pour in to fill the void. I wasn’t so concerned about that. If I removed one thing, I figured I could remove another. Re-commit as needed to holding the space.
It wasn’t a once-and-for-all decision. It isn’t a never-again decision. It’s a decision for today. For now.
Sometimes I miss my shows. And I’ve no doubt I’ll find them again, find new ones, let a little tv back in at some point. But for today, for now, I really like the space that grows between the stories, between the images, between the thoughts.
It’s peaceful there.
I’m not sure I can have that peace and have my shows, too. So for now I choose the space.